A Pagan's String Theory

Try not to let that little guy there to the right bother you too much. He just needed some suntime.

This... concept that I'm working that this post has to do occurred to me this morning after modeling the new skirt for my husband. It's pretty rad by the way. 

My mind being the rabbit hole racer that it is took off like a shot on the concept of sewing. Now for those who didn't know it, I've always had an extreme interest in archaeology and experimental archaeology.  The later is what a lot of the living history enthusiasts should actually be classified under in my humble opinion. My mind doing canyon jumps like it does from time to time hit remembered that sewing is most likely one of the oldest home making skills second only to probably leather working.  As in someone had a bunch of skin scraps that they couldn't afford to waste and the first scrap blanket was born.  

The two probably go hand in hand farther back than what we can currently imagine. With waning and waxing ice ages, massive volcanic eruptions that turned day into night for weeks on end, bold migrations into cooler climates that had more food animals but the nights could freeze you..... our ancestors would have needed to craft from whatever they could protective clothing. Weaving most likely didn't start to occur until our ancestors were better able to comprehend fiber and probably followed on the heels of sewing and skin working by only a couple hundred years by my best guess. Before all that was the advances in our tool making allowing us to more efficiently use a dead animal. Sewing and using skins more efficiently was only a natural progression. 

It's estimated that one branch of our genetic lineage, the Denisovan's (first found in Siberia's Denisova Cave) were using sewing needles as far back as 50,000 years ago. The article talking about this amazing find is here at Atlas Obscura. 

It most likely wasn't until roughly the 14,000's BCE before things like embroidery, crocheting or knitting might have begun to show up in their most earliest forms. Most likely the first embroidered piece of fabric was a mistake. Crochet and knitting were probably due to bored ancient humans trapped in the caves by long periods of foul weather.

Now we're going to put a pin in this train of thought and go back to the paganism for a bit.


Many people when they think sewing, knitting or any of those thread related activities and paganism, will inevitably come up with some very cutesy things utilizing these skills as means to express themselves or express a concept that they find beautiful and that rings true for them in their practice.

Many practicing pagans are exceptionally crafty (in the physical sense).
Many pagans also venerate or even worship the ancestors. 

Ancestor adoration comes in many forms and some major cultures in the world (many of which are in Asia) have been shaped extensively by it.

In terms of genetics, we all share the same ancestors whether some fucktards like to admit it or not.  Everything that binds those ancestors together into who we are is on our skin, under my fingertips as I type, the food we eat daily, the water we drink.

The first crafts or skills to manifest were surely sewing, leather working, tanning and cooking.

What if....we as Pagans in our search to connect with our ancestors on a practical and meaningful level has been in front of us all along?

What if it's not the incense that smells of old trees or a young (in terms of genetic history) translation of the Book of the Dead?

What if it's not the empty seat at the Dumb Feast?

What if it's not been the pictures in old albums and family legends told when feasting with friends?

What if the means to literally be connected with every branch of our genetic ancestry right back to even the first upright great apes has been at our finger tips the entire time?

If we were to take every single pagan and line them up, every one of them would have something that they posses a crafting aptitude for. Within that aptitude is the possibility of connection with our ancestors.

In every baby blanket crocheted or knit, one carries on the tradition of gifts to the new mother to help her even the odds of the new baby making it through a cold night. Every button stitched back, every tear closed, every meal cooked and shared, every dress or pair of pants... we move our hands in the same ways as our ancestors. 

By the sheer practice of these skills, those nameless ones find themselves with a sense of immortality. 

Despite all of our technological advances and our baby steps towards goals like colonizing the Moon and Mars and farther, we still every day take off the one thing that could truly stand out as being the first sign of our humanity: clothing.

We may not have made that favorite t-shirt from the plants fibers with our own hands but every time we put it on, somewhere in the past an ancestor's gleam of inspiration is there as the beginning. 

So my Pagan String theory is this:
It may feel modern, but you've allow yourself the right perspective you can still look over your shoulder and see that person holding up two pieces of skin and the idea in their head forming of how to connect them.
We, in our every day supposed hobbies, connect in the most literal way possible with our ancestors every time we pick up tool and thread and material.

Time for a change.

"Uh oh.... what kind of change Evie?"

Relax.  It's... okay yeah actually it is kinda major.

One of the things that a Witch should be doing frequently, is introspection.  Self-improvement is vital but ego is meant to be a tool, not make you into a tool.

One must be aware of their interactions in every light.

Yesterday I found myself staring back at the realization that I have a large amount of work to do... and that I can't do it with my facebook stuff still active.  We ALL know how much a time sink that place can be.

Well it's also the home of keyboard warriors and their liquid courage.  Loose lips sink ships?

Loose fingers cause episodes.

Last two months have been many micro and small episodes after scanning my facebook feed and coming away dealing with memories.  That's a little too much power over someone.  I can't keep sacrificing my productivity just be online and debate with someone.   I better things to do, than sit on the floor staring at my computer screen wondering how the fuck someone could so god damn stupid.  The site is going full on depression trigger some days.

What happens when something has too much power of you?  You remove it. Completely.

Everything on Facebook is going to be shut down a few days before Yule.  Probably will be back up online there next summer.  The Zibbit and Etsy will be on vacation from December 18th to January 15th.  They'll be online and available for your perusal after January 15th again.  However, there may not be a lot of in-stock things.

I am going to be working on a new website, one where I can have the store, this blog and everything I work on in ONE place.

Yeah, there are folks I won't know how are doing because the only way we interact is Facebook.  There's only a few of folks that I'll actually seriously miss that I only interact with on FB.  Like a Controlled Chaos and MurphyMonster's Dad...  But the site has become a source of stress, and less and less enjoyment every day.  I'm looking at Ello and maybe MiWe I think it was called as maybe a new option over Facebook, but I'm not sure on those either.

But I am dangerously close to burning out.  I can feel that crinkling sensation that seems to happen at the edge when you've pushed yourself on one particular topic for too long.

You do what you have to in order to take care of yourself.  Regardless of what others might think is best for you.  They aren't you.  They aren't dealing with the consequences of YOUR actions.  They aren't responsible for your mess, your emotions, your problems.  You can weigh their advice against a situation, and toss it if you know it's wrong.

Sometimes the only piece of advice that's worth listening to is, "Now I'm not you..."

Black Zone

That's what I've taken to calling it.

October 2011 - March 2012.

When I hit my worst bought of depression since I was 16-17 years of age.

I don't remember most of November or December.  January was when things start moving upward and March was when for the first time since I was 11 or 12... I didn't feel like I was covered in oil.

I talk about this because I'm still bummed out.  Not as badly as the Black Zone, but still.  It's fucking with my productivity, my ability to keep the PTSD from getting severe in terms of symptoms.  Minor flashbacks I can deal with.... but not when they go on all day.

With the fiance going on work that I can't come along with, it's harder to fight days off like that.  He's become a very big part of my world and being able to deal with this shit.  So when he's not around and I don't get to see him for a few days.... yeah.  It's bad.  Dark gray.  Not Black, but definitely a darker grey than I like.

A part of what made January the recovery that it was, was because I had picked up the habit of crocheting one small thing a day.  Usually first thing in the day, after morning coffee and lovings from the MindyCat.  Be it a hat or a neck purse.

There were literally days, were that was all I did.  Was make hats.  Beanies to be precise.

I get one done, get up walk around, stoke the fire, re-clean something (I had mice seeing as how I was in the middle of the woods) and then would sit back down, pick two new colors and make another hat.

I made a lot of hats and purses.

I think I need to return that habit of one small thing made a day.  It puts something down as having accomplished something, and that causes a massive release of endorphin's to counteract the grey.  It makes it was easier to get other things done to.

And by the end of the day, I've managed to get at least two or three things done.  When you deal with depression a lot, that's a major accomplishment.

Even if that one thing, multiplies into several of the same thing.... I've gotten something.  I've made a step, from dark grey to towards actual colors again.

The orders are getting done though.  I'm not as bogged down this year as I was last year.

Don't be surprised if a bunch of bags and hats appear in the shop soon.

Pass the Coffee dudes.....

7:30 am this morning....awake.

I managed to get a 15 minute nap. After that it was very clear, there wasn't any going back to sleep.  Oh well.

The to-do list for today includes working on streamlining and cleaning up the facebook page for Jade Rose Zen, which also got a slight name change.  Jade Rose Zen ThreadWorks.

Someone finally went, hey the name doesn't really say much besides being catchy.  *head desk*

Never fails, either people won't give any advice or give too much.  Thankfully my friend Erin knows where to draw the line when it comes to advice.  Lovely gal that she is.

Though last night she asked me, what the heck it was that going on with JRZT.  Etsy brings in half of my orders but zero traffic.  Zibbet brings almost all of my traffic, but no orders.  Half of my orders come from Facebook, but maybe ten percent of traffic.

*head desk; head desk; head desk*

I do plan on building a website that is my store and independent of the crapp shoots that all these sellers.  Whether or not it work out..... well, that's another ball game and one that I'm not going to address until after the move.

And of course, Jade Rose Zen Threadworks even without the spaces is too long for Etsy, but the title can have it....

*rubs temples*

How one manages to stay sane while attempting to maneuver all this shit is beyond me.   So what's on tap for new stuff coming to the Facebook page?  Hopefully by the end of today, I'll have things organized better.  I am not an ads person.  Hell, I can barely write descriptions for the stuff I make that is outside of what the measurements are.  That's all folks need right?  Along with a good two or three pics....

Seriously how the hell do some of these folks come up with this prattle that is in their items listings?

Adding four new albums to the Facebook page, including a available for custom order catalog, knitting, crocheting and a paracord catalog.

Also, I call bullshit on anyone who says the economy is getting better.  PTUI!

Go fuck a duck.  Seriously.  Last year, I was getting several big orders.  This year, I had one big one and everything is small things.  Even small things are great though, but folks just aren't spending their money.  They're holding onto it tightly because they don't know when things are going to suddenly break on their cars that they've duct taping and wishing along as pieces start rattling that really shouldn't rattle.

Hell, I know folks who are trading quarts of food they canned two years ago to shade tree mechanics to get their brakes fixed, oil changed, etc.  People are trading goods for services.   Which is a time-honored tradition by the way.  One that I fully practice whenever able.  To be honest, things are not going to be better economy wise.  There's too many bubbles, there's too many head in the sand and there's coming up probably a few years where you're going to want armed guards on the fields protecting crops.

Won't last for several years though, probably 3-6 at the most.  Americans are bred from incredibly hardy stock, from all over the world.  There's a very unique spirit there that after a time will shake itself clean and look around and go, "Oh hell.  This needs fixed, and this needs fixed...."  So they start fixing stuff in their own lives, which produces this gorgeous ripple effect.  It starts inspiring other folks to get off their asses and get work done.

Oops, there I go another tangent again... what was I talking about... oh yeah, the shop.   I'll be taking a decent number of pictures today of the paracord stuff.  There so much of it, they can literally be broken down by color.  Heck, I'll throw up a second post late today with everything in it.  Sound good?

Well, I'm done rambling for today.  Time for coffee and breakfast.  Ya'll have a great weekend okay?

More Odds and Ends...

I do believe I'm on the upswing from the bummed out episode of the beginning of the month.  Which is a good thing considering the amount of work that I'm tackling in terms of the crochet and knitting orders.  However that means I'll be cutting time online in many ways.

Outside of my music addictions that is...

I've noticed I get a weird kind of lonely.  Like not for a lot of company but one particular person's company.  Yeah him.  Heh, what do you expect?  I love him and we help each other stay happy.

Down side is I have 19 pages to type up (which are handwritten and it translates that three handwritten pages usually equal one typed page... unless you're one of those people with small and neat handwriting which in that case go fuck off.... I hate you....)

Some people are able to force themselves to write and you can't tell the difference between the forced writing and the parts that they wrote in a fit of inspiration that lasted almost all day, and yielded blah-k number of words.  Me... I can't do that.  My muse will give me weird looks when she's feeling writing lazy but wants to crochet.  Or when she wants to write and I want to crochet.

My muse is a multitask-er.  She likes that I can do many different creatives things.  She gets frustrated when I have to remind her I only have two arms. Trust me, I'd love to have two sets.  One doing the yarn work and one typing furiously down all the blasted ideas that roll through my head.

Oh to be Pilot...

I'm actually hoping that once we get the desktop built, I can get one of those write as you speak softwares.  That would make a lot of things easier because I could be on the couch working on the next project and when an idea hits, I can just start talking but keep working.  Being able to do both at once....

Hey a woman can dream can't she?  =D

Also, one more thing.  Yesterday, I grabbed up the The Giver series Omnibus.  The trailers had intrigued me so I grabbed it up.  At least once a month, I have to read a book.  Else the brain fog like I was experiencing earlier this week, just gets worse and it gets harder to get what I need to, done.

It was a pleasant read.  Four books though in six hours time is... well.... I'm a fast reader.  It's just how it is.  However, do not read the books and then see the movie.  You will be pissed.  The trailer has given me enough indications that the movie will be identical in name, character names and maybe a few elements of the story line.  THAT'S IT.

I'm a bit disgusted that the author didn't put her foot down more when they bought the rights for a movie.  There is a good story there, but the fucktards of H-town fucked it up big time.  If you're interested in the Giver series, click that link up there and it'll take you to the Omnibus, which is a better buy than all four separately.

November...

Crikey!

Where'd the year go?

Also, a happy and blessed All Hallows Day to those of you who celebrate it.

Well it's National Write a Novel Month.

"Oooohhhh... will you participating Evie?"

Yes and no.

I have a few ideas, but nothing solid.  Factor in that I just got two new orders for baby blankets from the neighbor. As much as I would like to try my hand on it, I have too much work to devote each and every single day to it.  (Which honestly is a luxury.)

I do however firmly believe in aiding others with creative endeavors, so I went hunted up about four-five writing prompts websites.  Hopefully, they'll have something that you can use.

The Teacher's Corner

Daily Teaching Tools: Journal Prompts (Try not to guffaw so hard there, you might hurt yourself.)

Poets and Writers

Creative Writing Prompts

Writing Forward: 25 writing prompts

Ya'll have a good (and productive for those you writing) weekend!

Fuck off Murphy....

punk ass.  I can see you over there just waiting for your chance.  It was a bitch ass move to make the Fiance's boots a half size too small, but those little things are the only thing you better fuck with this November.  Bitch.

Well I am back to just as normal for me as I can get.  The muscle pain is gone and well my appetite is not quite still there yet, it's recovered as well as can be expected.

With the recovery came being able to double down on work again. How much you work you ask?

Allow me to breakdown my orders for you.

Order #1, what's left of it anyways:
A green coat
A light browns coat
A messenger bag

Order two:
2 Toothless (yeap, cute little bugger)

Order #3:
A Ma Cobb hat
A dark blue and black scarf

Order #4:
Another Ma Cobb Hat

Order #5:
A large green shawl

Order #6:
Three Christmas stockings

Order #7:
Dolls (though how many of these I'll be making I'm not sure yet...)

"That's a lot of work there..."

Well kinda.  I have all the patterns, I know what and how these are all going to look like (save the messenger bag, I keep changing my mind on it.)  However I've also got pictures I need to take, and my fiance is never home long enough to doing nothing for long enough to get drafted.

I need a kid... Well... maybe not.  I need more space, which we're going to get when we move to Arizona.  Which means more cooking and baking (yay!). And I digress....

Anyways, that means you guys who take the time to read here, may be getting stuck with cheat articles of pictures of projects as they are coming along and videos of cute stuff.  Maybe some prepping or survivalist videos if I can find some I like.  (Yeah, key term there.)

Sadly I do not have any Samhain plans (pronounced Sow-in) aka Halloween for you mundanes. I'm fairly certain it'll rather simple, spiced cider and a good meal with the Fiance.  I'm rather content with that actually.

Anyways, I hope you're all having a good week, a great Thursday and I'll see ya'll Saturday.

Meanwhile, I'm going to enjoy some more coffee, and then get cracking on work.

Oh Monday, Monday...

Almost back to normal from Thursday kicking my almost-non existent ass.  All that's left is the small meals I'm eating around 4-5 times a day, mild fatigue and some still serious back muscle pain.  I'm just over here thanking the Gods that it's not spasms (!!!).

Been thinking about either doing an auction on the Jade Rose Zen facebook page or doing a "12 days of Christmas/Yule" flash sale event and having about two things a day.

Either way, I'll be cross posting to Google +  plus as well and here to the blog.  Among everything will be some of the really popular stuff, like the dolls, shawls and blankets, but there will be some surprises in there too. =)

In the meantime, I'm going back to bouncing around youtube listening to music, working on orders and sitting in my comfy chair.

In the meantime, here's something I found today.  Enjoy:

Heads up

Crapp... where'd October go?

It's coming up on that time of the year where my orders for knit and crocheted stuff skyrocket.

You folks know you can buy handmade gifts year round right?  And that it really helps out the person making them?   Anyways...

After the gear article series is done on Blue Collar Prepping, I won't be doing weekly articles until January 15th, 2015.  There a few reasons this, one that I just spoke of in the upper paragraphs.

1) I have several orders for Christmas already, and the last day that I'm accepting custom work in order to get it out by December 16th is November 15th.  After that the custom options are getting shut off until January 15th.

2) I'm about on dry in terms writing material that I can crack out.  A large number of the articles I had done for BCP was due to the fact that I didn't feel like a large number of these prepping blogs where actually addressing things that were important... they were all doom and gloom. (Hey, one of the things you're going to have to keep an eye is depression and you stupid fucks writing all doom and gloom aren't helping, ya jackasses.)

Yes I've had some coffee this morning but not a full cup yet.  How can you tell?

So when I am back full in January, I will have more articles on skills that are a good idea to be known and understood if you want to be comfortable during hard times.  First series once back I'm planning on doing a break down of gardening and bits and pieces of information you may not know.

3) We are trying to get moved from California to Arizona.  This is proving to be a major stress factor for me because we have soooooooo many things that we need to straighten out first before we can move.

Hence why I'm focusing on the crochet orders as much as possible so that they are as good as I can make them, and keep setting up that reputation as a good crafter for myself.  This is because the Zibbet and Etsy store are my main sources of income, outside of the tiny bit that comes in from Amazon links.

This blog here will be maintained, but it'll mostly be just showing orders that I've managed to get done and probably cute video of puppies, kittens and other various animals doing adorable shit.  But it's going to be a tiny bit erratic.

Now it's entirely possible that I will get all my orders done by the 16th of December.  What am I going to do between then and my return date of January 16th?

Simple.

Chill.

I have books to read, to work on and a large amount of research to do for the next year's articles.  If I do this right, I'll end up with several months worth of material again.

And probably several more adventures along the way.

In the meantime...

BABY BURRO!

Seen near Lake Havasu.

Hand over the coffee....

.... and nobody gets hexed today.

Bleh.

So I managed to be able to watch some television yesterday and on top of that, with the fiance too!

Mike Rowe's "Somebody's Gotta Do It" on CNN on Wednesdays.

I love you Mike.

I dearly love his body of work and the foundation that he's started to get people back into infrastructure jobs as those have suffered greatly at the hands of this "You have to have a college degree to get anywhere" bullshit.

Then it was several hours of Alaska: The Last Frontier on Discovery channel.

I seriously heart the Kilcher (sp?) family.  I love Alaska, I love that raw hard edge homesteading and I love the fact that so much of that show makes me either laugh from memories my parents told me of, I've been in that situation at one point or it was just amusing.

To be honest, I think most of you folks take being able to laugh for granted.

Like today, I woke up and my headspace is not quite right today.

I don't really know why, I didn't see anything that was even remotely a trigger, but I'm fighting the urge to crawl back under the covers and it's not because I'm tired.

But I have yarn and music and I'm chilling still in Phoenix.  The place is just that much better that I know I'm going to be all right in a few hours.

So it's just this today.  Enjoy being able to laugh.

Glorious

So yesterday was eight hours in the car.  We left, I chilled in the vehicle while he dealt with a court thing and then we grabbed some .22 and 45 and started driving.

This morning I wake up in a gloriously different place from LA.  Yeap, Arizona.

"How can Arizona be better that California?"

Ah my dears, that is because you might be forgetting that everyone has different priorities.  I'm a Witch, k?

Here in Arizona the vibe...it's the difference between stepping into cool water on a hot day and looking at dirty, muddy, been tramped in for weeks on end and knowing you can't get out of going in.  The latter being California.

The vibe is just better.  It's cleaner. It's less artificial feeling to me to be honest.  Plus there's constitutional carry.  ^_^

Now onto the gross bits...

Gross bit section begin:
An update on the ongoing project of using re-usable cotton pads.  Ever since I was started my periods, my right ovary has been the real cunt of the two.  Everything from when the cramps hit of collapsing at work and getting sent home to being violently ill for about four days.  My left one is not as bad.   Hell the left one is a little angel compared to this bitch of a right one. The left one about 75% only causes cramps for about a day and 100% of the time cravings for red meat.  (The rawer, the better!)

Well since using the cotton ones I made, the right one has been reduced from four days to two days.  This is a major improvement.

Another thing I've noticed is that the tissue lining (this is what you end up bleeding during the period) seems to be having an easier time of coming loose.  I've gone from 4-8 days of periods to 3-6.  Yes this means heavier periods, however that just in the first day or two.  This means I'm back on my feet and able to be fully productive again faster.

Read that last sentence again and understand that that is incredibly important to me.  If I'm not feeling close to 100%, I can't do my crochet work.... this leads to other problems.

End Gross Part

Another thing that has cropped up that is going to be crucial to address, is the fact that I have lost my familiarity with guns.  This pisses me off to no end.  Hence why grabbing a bit of 22 from storage and 45 was so damn important yesterday.

I'm one of the girls who used to work for Oleg Volk for fuck's sake, I knew guns and they were
merely objects.

Really fun to shoot objects, but pistols and rifles held no power.  Now, because of losing my familiarity with them...they bring back a few memories that I don't need.  Like the fact that one of my first firearms teachers was also treating me like a cumbucket ("You have no concept of how to easy on yourself do you?" Nope.) and was also one of my rapist when it was all said and done.  He was a lousy fucking teacher.  Can't handle shotguns because of it.  (Fuck him by the way.  Karma ain't done with him yet.)

This is going to be one of the harder projects to work on as I refuse to let this stand.  I will be pistol packing again full time once in Arizona full time and I'm not going to do it afraid.  I will not let something that helps me be able to walk unafraid of other piece of shit wanna be humans, be a fucking PTSD trigger.

I will not be afraid.

Fear is the mind killer....

John Wallin Liberto - Artist plus a few updates from me.

"You're here!"

Late, but here.  And in case you're wondering why the dolls on the right would be your answer.  Another order finished and will be on its way to a hopefully very happy customer.  So while I'm nomming on my treat (yeah it's just McDonalds double hamburgers, but it's still a treat damnit!) let's jump into the next artist I was newly introduced to here recently.


Now anyone who knows me really well knows that I am in fact a Halo girl.  Halo: Combat Evolved for PC was my first computer game and the fourth Science Fiction universe that I found had found that I really really liked.  Halo has expanded into this lovely complex series of games, books, cartoons and comics.

Halo 4 was how I was introduced to the work of John Wallin Liberto

.
*shiver*  Pass me the battle rifle!

John is a rising star it seems in the concept artist world, so be sure to check out his linked above.

And that is it for today.  I'll see you guys tomorrow and I'll warn you right, it's going to be gross and mushy and all personal like.

(Whether or not the following is an official trailer for Halo 5, I've been able to ascertain.  Either way, enjoy!)

Still sick...

Not as bad though.

Still don't feel up to anything besides being miserable.

Plus side though this got done....

Oh blech

So for whatever reason today, I keep having minor flashbacks and it's proving hard to want to be online.

So here have something cute:

And one more for good measure:

Aye aye aye

Kinda stressing right now.

I have an order that I am working on that requires me to learn how to crochet cables.

....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have a small deadline on that order, plus two more jackets to design and make, a messenger bag, two cloches, two dolls to finish.

How am I dealing?

By probably going on a hike and exploring an alluvial fan that is near us.  Near being relative at about 15 minutes to get to.  (I love living so close to a national forest!)

Why?

Because I learned a long time ago, the hard way, that it's not okay to just beat yourself through to a deadline.  Yeah I'm going to be tired when I get back, but I've noticed when I've taken time to go outdoorsy things, my productivity is double what it would have been if I hadn't.

It's common sense.

Yeah, I was greatly refreshed from my time in Lake Havasu, but I don't feel fully recovered from this month yet.  That said, tomorrow is going to be a busy day of crocheting, sketching and sharing some pics of the fan.

Plus, the hot water heater in our apartment building is out.  This while it may not yield any prepping lessons or experience, it's applicable in that you have to get creative in order to stay comfortable and clean.

I really like sharing pictures of the places I'm getting to explore and I hope you guys are enjoying them too.  Hopefully for tomorrow as well, I will have Jacket One done and some really good pictures of that.

See ya tomorrow! =)

Oh that's frustrating...

So I get messages from time to time on Etsy from friends of friends being sent to me looking for a particular crocheted thing.

Most of the time, after they hear/see the price they almost always "Thank you for your reply."

Which among us crafters is code for "Why the fuck would I pay that when I can get it from Wal*Mart for 3.99?"

The item in question this time was a beautiful crocheted cloche with flower embellishment.  22-25 bucks.

That covers the materials (which would need to a bit finer of a yarn for the flowers and leaves) and barely covers my time.

This is one of the most... derogatory things that happens on a weekly basis for all crafters I think.  Someone asks us to make something and for how much and then what happens?  The above.

Something else that coincides with this response is almost always the fact that the person who does this, 95% of the time is the same kind of person who bitches about "American jobs being sent overseas".  Here's a newsflash for you oh stupid one, stop fucking taxing businesses out of existence.
Here's a little background for those of you who aren't familiar with how hand crafts like mine work.

We'll use a beanie, as an incredibly simple example.

The basic beanie, can be down with one thread or two.   With any of the stitches know as single, double or treble and hell all the ones in between.

It takes 1-3 skeins of yarn, depending on how nice of a yarn or color variety you want. These range in price from 3.14 for 236 yards of thread (215 meters) to 8.99 for 174 yards.

Then the average crafting time is anywhere from an hour and 45 minutes to five hours (this is dependent on skill level and experience level).  I average an hour and 45 minutes on simple beanies.

Now, let's just say that for a really nice cloche I decide to go with a finer thread for the flowers.  This finer thread costs 6.99 a skein, and I get two in two different colors.  Then one skein at 3.14 for the main hat.

Now that puts me at 17.12 already.  And I haven't even started working on the hat yet.

So we'll say there's four flowers.  Each flower takes me 45 minutes for a total of 3 hours.
The cloche takes me 2 hours to make.

So that's five hours for this hat.  Now at the higher quoted price of 24 dollars minus the 17.12 leaves 6.88.

Now divide 6.88 by 5.

That is 1.376 an hour.

We won't go into any of the other things I make.

I put five hours of time into a hat, and am only asking 24 bucks for it.

Do the crafting community a favor: If you aren't willing to pay for quality and for the investment of our time, don't even open a fucking conversation with us.

In case you're wondering what it would cost if I put in the 8.75 min wage just to give you a baseline:
43.75 and that's just the cost of the time.  Plus material and shipping... try 60 bucks at least.

Do me and the rest of the crafting community a favor: don't get snotty, snobby, condescending, arrogant, snide, rude or belligerent with me when I give you a very reasonable price, when I'm the one who knows how much time goes into my work, not you.  I know my work is going to last you for several years when that junk you buy from some chain store is going to worthless in less than a year.

Stop your bitching about sending jobs overseas when you won't even invest in small business here.

Guilty little pleasures.

Between designing new orders that are coming and actually sitting down and working on them, I have this tendency of plugging into the computer for one of two things: music or a small guilty pleasure of mine: Speculative History Theories.

Yes, I mean things like Ancient Aliens or America Unearthed.  

"Run that by me again Evie?"

Yeah, you read that right.

Growing up, I was always reading whatever I could get my hands on.  Even as a small child, I could tell: History was what those who wrote the textbooks, wanted it to say.  Oh sure you could get the whole picture, but you had to dig for it.  A lot of digging.

One of the best examples of Speculative History is all the weird shit that came out of World War II.  Many of the scientific advances that were made by Nazi Germany were light years ahead of the Allies. We won't go into the ethical or moral of how they got many of those advances, as that's enough information, craziness and straight up atrocities as to fill a library the size of the Library of Congress. And those are just the stories and pieces that aren't classified.  Take the Bismark for example.  We still have only an inkling as to what all technology was on that ship, as none of the tech has ever been recovered nor is the ship in a water condition that would allow for salvaging.

Even today there are massive complexes in areas formerly occupied by the Axis's armies... that we can't get to because the entrances were destroyed and any attempts to reach the known chambers would fail due to the surrounding geological instabilities that were caused when the retreating Nazi's destroyed the entrances.  We have no idea what might be in them.  This is speculative history at it's best and most fertile ground for the imagination.

Growing up I was always fascinated by archaeology and geology.  Even I as an amateur, am aware there are sites out there, that don't fit with the "official" timeline of the human history.  Whether or not the secrets hidden are relevant is besides the point, the point is that they are being hidden, so that the "story of the Earth" fits with whatever the academics want.  *shrugs* Well, if that's their teapot, fine but earthquakes can happen anywhere. ;-)

Back to why this is a guilty little pleasure.  Most of the theories are just that, theories.  Speculation on whats, whys, hows, and wheres.  Because for me, speculation is fun.  Now, I have my limits.  It has to be plausible speculation.  Conspiracy theories.... don't count because 99.999999999% of those aren't even plausible.

I have to admit as a geologist wanna-be, America Unearthed is my favorite so far. Scott (can't remember his last name right now to save my life) has been a good watch so far.  He admits when he's entertained by ideas, but there's not enough evidence to support it being even plausible.  He doesn't declare something ancient man made just to make ratings.  An example would be the recent seasons episode on Rockwall Texas and their namesake.  Which turned out to be an impressively rare geological phenomenon but it was still fascinating as to how the rock wall was formed.

So that's my bit here for the day, I'll see y'all tomorrow.  I have a crocheted jacket in the home stretch and about 6 more episodes of America Unearthed to help me get through.  =)

*Stitch, stitch, stitch....*

"Just keep stitching, just keep stitching."

There are many days and times were this is the only mantra that I have going through my head.  It certainly was last week.  Concept called mindful knitting or crocheting.

I had stumbled onto this on my own a few years back but a friend recently pointed it out to me online, and a rabbit hole later I'd found a lot of information on it.

Why mindfulness is great?

Pretty simple actually.

You're are preventing events of that day/moment from draining you of energy you need for other things.  You're removing the power an event or memory has over you, by focusing on the yarn and project in your hand.

We are all aware of the significance of last week (9/11).  Being the passionate woman that I am (Yes, I heard that chortle) I decided for my sanity (what little of it that's left) would be better spent knitting or crocheting last week. As I had two personal anniversaries that make me cringe still that week, one of them being my first wreck ever at 26 (yes, I was pretty lucky to go that long, but there were a lot of things I could have done to avoid that wreck. No one was killed or badly injured, but it still bothers me a LOT).

And as we all know, 9/11 brings out the idiots of various conspiracy theories and just plain bullshit of people who can't seem to grasp the manner.  I hate that entire bullshit.  I repeat, HATE that bullshit.  It's one of the disrespectful displays of arrogance, bubble syndrome and plain naivete.  It spits on the graves of those who were lost when people quibble over what happened.

I still have the image seared into my head of them showing what used to be a dozen floors squashed into a space less than, if I recall correctly, four feet thick.  I'm still stunned by the news from friends who lost folks, that they are still identifying remains even today.

Those two reasons are part of why I won't engage in the endless roundabouts of what happened.  It's rude to the dead and disrespectful to the people who survived the events and the folks that the victims left behind.  Then you have the repercussions of those events, that increased all who were affected.  Which is a whole other kit and kaboodle of worms that need thrown on fishing hooks and drowned while sitting on the banks of a lake or river, while sipping cold beer and enjoying those who are with you.

So I put my headphones in or talked to my fiance or we went and watched the sunsets.  I just kept stitching.  Mindfulness extends to not just knitting or crocheting.  You can apply it to washing dishes, walking dogs, reading books, sharpening tools, cleaning guns, sitting with a cup of coffee and just watching the sunrise or sunrise or a thunderstorm move, etc.  It's healthy.  It counter acts depression.

It lets you have a few moments of just you. Of sweet, lucid, calming sliver of time that is just you and the world.  It lets you step back and reevaluate what's going on.  Re-establishes your boundaries, your balance, your center.  It takes the edge of this rape victim's PTSD flashbacks. It shortens them. Makes me lucid faster.  Yeah, the project ends up a bit wet from crying (yeah, I just admitted that), but I'm out of it faster.  It lets me work off the anger over careless from people who should know better and it let me work off the hatred over ignorant dipshits who don't know what the fuck it is they are talking about.

I've received a lot of criticism in the past year or so, over an increasing reluctance to commit to "pet causes."  There's been a rash of "warm fuzzy" causes, that you do for less than a minute and you get to brag you did for a couple of days and then what?  That was shallow, fleeting and you're back at square one with...well, I can't classify what for you as I'm not you.  And yes, this me criticizing several things all lumped together.

When you decide to champion a cause, you need to do it every day, even if it's just for a few minutes of sharing relevant information or laying out plans for the next event, etc.  You need to actually champion it.  You need to wear it like a tattoo.

So in response to a rather snide cunt, who may or may not be female, I'll listing out my causes again for all to see.  I don't really care if they are you "flavor" nor do I give a flying fuck if they align with your politics.  These are my babies, that I want to help as much as I am able to help. Many times, all I can do is help spread the word they exist but at least I'm trying to stay consistent.

The Battle Buddy Foundation  

Hats for Our Veterans

Right now, that's because I can't find the others or even remember which folders I have them bookmarked into.  Hats is run by a sweet lady, and donates several dozen (I think this year they managed a couple hundred hats) to organizations that work with homeless vets.  It's not much, but a warm hat, scarf and gloves is better than nothing, which is what I otherwise have.

For TBBF, it's sharing as frequently as I can and spreading the word.

So there.  That's my ramblings for today.  Now if you'll excuse me....*stitch stitch stitch stitch stitch...*

It's looking lazy...

It's been one of those weeks.  I despise weeks like that to be honest but when your muses don't wanna play, you just kinda roll with it and work on projects that don't require too much creative juice.

You can throw some podcasts on in the background and just veg crochet.  You ignore deadlines.  You ignore the phone.  You ignore the world.

The end result is a bit jarring. You're a lot calmer at the end of that day.  You're able to look at things much more objectively.  You're able to look at discussions and go... This ain't my circus.  Fuck these idiots.  I have better things to do.

Like figure out what's going into my Book of Shadows.  Usually a Wiccan, Witch, Pagan, etc will keep a large amount of collected information and things that they've actually tried in terms of spells and rituals in said book.  

I've been studying and practicing for about... 13 years now.  My book of shadows is... sad looking.  I don't have a lot in it right now, but that's because I've not really done a lot of this "formal magick."  Formal magick being used in reference to actually collecting spell and ritual components, doing the groundwork of divining the right time of the day/night and doing the quarter calls, invocations etc.  I call that formal work.  When was the last time I did a ritual?  About two years ago.  I did one to finally fully let go of the babies I had lost in my miscarriages.  Named, said good-bye to one at a time, and let go of.

Most of the magick I do, when I actually find it's needed, is informal.  It's "Oh shit, that's a lot of friends on facebook reporting they feel like shit, time to break out some light blue and white candles!"  and let them burn through the day.   It's "damnit, I didn't need to think about this past traumatic event, time for some purple."   It's "That's our neighbors arguing for the fifth time this week and it's only Tuesday, I'm smudging right now because I don't need that shit leaking in."

It's having fluorite and Tiger's Eye in my pocket that I can play with when I'm out in public and start feeling the anxiety coming on.  (Mine deals with too many people in one place, have had that problem since I was little, but it got worse as you can expect with the PTSD fully actualized.)  It's having animals get a lot closer to me than other humans just to say hi.  (Heh, the Fiance is still getting used to this.)

But I'm digressing, back to the Book of Shadows.  It's always evolving to be honest.  At least they should be.  As you're growing in your craft, your book should be growing and evolving to reflect the information you're learning and not just about magick, but also about yourself.

Mine is like I said, kinda empty.  Mostly because I've been journaling in a separate book for over twenty years.  What goes in the BOS is what I use in my magick frequently.  Mostly just to commit the information to memory more than to refer to, but it's still kinda....well, abnormal if you believe a chunk of the magick community.

Keeping true to yourself in magick is more important than keeping true to a set dogma taught via book or person.  Else, it just spins out of control and you will find spells going haywire, situations that were once peachy going sour, finances crumble, etc.

It's crunch time!

As I don't have anything off the top of my head that I'd like to rant about, talk about, etc. as I'm in the middle of a crunch time and quite possibly frogging one of the jackets (again!)  so a copy and paste from my notes on Jade Rose Zen on Facebook will just have to suffice.

"Hey everyone, wanted to give y'all a heads up.

The last day of this year that I'm willing to accept to orders for the Holiday seasons is November 16th.  There will be NO MORE ORDERS ACCEPTED AFTER THAT DATE FOR THIS YEAR.  

I'm establishing this policy because I got rushed with orders last year at the last minute and I ended up being late with a few of them.  I don't like being late, I don't like being surprised with stuff at the last minute which I'm sure you don't enjoy either.  

If you are interested in something for Christmas, start telling me now!!!!!

It takes some serious time to get everything made, because I'm working designs and ordering yarn many times for your orders.  

I've already one order that I managed to convince to let me start on it back in June (And boy am I glad they agreed!!!).   

So if you are interested in buying from for this coming winter gift giving season, LET ME KNOW NOW!  

It's okay if you are on budget, and need to put the money back, but please remember I do have a PayPal now and we can work payments if you need to.

This year (after including other current orders) I have room to start designing and settling on yarn:

• 1 Doctor Who scarf.  Full sized, or reduced, this one is the good yarn that is incredibly close to color but a bit more expensive.  Please see the Note, Product list, for pricing.
• 2 twin sized afghans
• 1 coat (I only have time left to work one right now, this might change, I'll update this note if I can take more orders)
• 12 Ma Cobb hats
• 6 dolls
• 12 baby afghans and hats
• 6 shawls
• Tote and Messenger bags - 4, Purses, sized neck to small - 10

I do not have room to take orders on the following:

• full, queen, King sized afghans

 Thank you kindly for being one of my clients, and I'm looking forward to hearing from you!"

You can still find me on Etsy - Jade Rose Zen until December 14th.  That's the last day I can ship things and (hopefully) still get them to folks on time.  After that I'm not having an open shop on Etsy.  I won't be uploading anything new there.

Now on Zibbet- Jade Rose Zen I am open there now, and will be for hopefully several years.  There is new inventory up there and will continue to uploaded through out the season.  On November 16th, the custom order option will be coming down until January 14th.  Between December 14th and January 14th... I'm taking a VACATION!