Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Keeping mental pile ups in check.

I have to admit to being envious of my domestic partner and Fiancee right now.  He can fall asleep in under a minute.  Personally I think it was a trick he was taught by the Marines.  He can turn his brain off, like it was nothing.  Me?  Takes me a couple hours sometimes.  I'll end up laying there day dreaming, letting my brain wear itself out.

Decided to take a break from the net for a few days, so relax this was auto posted. =)

Things though in your head tend to pile up, like messes in your room or home.  There's always that one spot it seems that magickally accumulates shit.  And it builds up and up.  Part of what makes it so rough is half the time I don't get warnings when it's reached a critical mass. Other half the time, I can cut it off at the 90% point and work through stuff.  I never really know how long it take to sort the pile or even if I'll "find the floor" in the time I can take.

Even with keeping busy and trying to stay focused, that pile will start leaning and interfereing with everything.  That usually leads to meditating for awhile.

It's not as bad as it used to be though.  I have healed a lot in the past 12 months.  I am able to be creative again, not just with the crafting but also writing.  I can write again.  I used to write all the time.  I was decent at best but when I was hurt so badly back in 2010 and 2011, I was struggling creative wise.  Those were wounds that I had to step back and let heal on their own.

Its been worth it.  I think.

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